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1. Have faith in Dating that your life partner is out there, and you cannot and will not miss him/her.

2. Feel confident and not desperate. Desperation repels!

3. Drop your agenda and live fully in the now.

4. Remember there is no such thing as rejection, only the wrong fit or incompatibility! It is not about you, so don’t take it personally.

5. Focus on the other person if you feel awkward.

6. Quit sweating every phone call.

7. Be gentle with yourself. You’re learning to open up, and be vulnerable.

8. Give your dates a break, they are feeling as vulnerable and awkward as you.

9. Be aware of “the rubber band affect”!

10. Date with freedom – No strings!

11. Make no assumptions. If in doubt, always ask!

12. Be willing to speak your truth and say no lovingly. (you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do – have sex, smoke or other behaviours)

13. Avoid SMS and emails as the main form of communication. They are only complements to communication, but cannot substitute in person communication.

14. Understand that all love grows gradually. (your grandparents were right)

15. Maintain your other commitments with friends, gym, hobbies, spiritual beliefs and everything else you enjoy doing.

16. Take time to pray, meditate, say affirmations, and listen to your heart and what it is telling you about your relationships, dates, etc.

17. Trust! If you are soul-mates, ultimately nothing will keep you apart!

DATING: How to end your first date!!

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Dating is fun, but can be stressful. You worry about what to wear, what to say, what not to say… And then, there’s that uncomfortable moment at the end of the date.

Many a good date has gone suddenly wrong in those last few seconds. Perfectly nice people freeze up, freak out and for some strange reason say and do completely inappropriate things at the end of dates, believe me I know I have been there.

I did some research and what I have seen from my members from The Only Social Club, a personalised matchmaking service for professional singles I compiled some simple, common-sense recommendations so that you can avoid those uncomfortable moments and have a perfect goodbye at the end of your next date.

1. Remember these words, “It was nice meeting you.” If it was an awkward date and you’re not interested in seeing the person again, “It was nice meeting you,” is a graceful way to end your conversation.

2. If you want to see the person again, and go on another date, let them know. You already have each others phone numbers, etc… alternatively, if you feel uncomfortable letting the other person know that you wish to see them again let me know at The Only Social Club. (It is a personalised service)

3. It you don’t want to see the person again, never say, “Let’s do this again, sometime,” or something similar. It leads the other person on. Always treat others the way you would like to be treated.

4. Don’t lead someone on. And please do not agree to another date if your intentions are incorrect and then avoid the person’s phone calls.

5. Keep it light. Leave something for the next date.


It definitely takes more than one date to determine if you have chemistry. So, keep an open mind and think about seeing this person again. Remember, if you continue doing the same things you will get the same results.

The Modern Cupid (Meet Theo Malherbe)

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The ‘soulmate search’ has inspired novel after novel, been a long-running theme in film, and dominates many a mainstream. Reality TV tried it-with varying success. But is quitting your job to audition for a place among 24 ‘finalists’ vying for the heart of TV’s most eligible bachelor the only way to secure a date these days.

Simply put not anymore. Redefining the way South Africans search for true love is Theo Malherbe.

When Theo went through all of the dating possibilities himself, he recognised a global need for a service and launched The Only Social Club. It has now been in operation for over 5 years.

It is today one of the fastest-growing and most successful dating and matchmaking service in the country. In the 5 years that he has been in operation Theo Malherbe’s service has changed the way South African singles look for love.

While becoming a modern day cupid is a feat in itself, Theo’s venture has simultaneously catapulted him to entrepreneurial success.

“The Only Social Club is a facility which introduces high-calibre people in a professional manner, where Integrity and Confidentiality are guaranteed, and matches are made to one’s unique specifications,” explains Theo. Remember matchmaking was a big thing in the old days.

“The Only Social Club is not a sex service and no numbers and names game but deals rather in quality relationships. It is an opportunity that has tremendous appeal for many professionals of all walks of life,” insists Theo. He mentions that professionals invest in other areas of there lives why not invest in your personal life.  All matches are done according to ones specifications and remember everyone has a wish list. Do you fit what you are looking for??

“There are many single lonely people, and almost everyone is trying to meet a companion, soulmate or lover. Our aim and mission is to have all members dating and in a successful relationship,” he explains.

“Many members understand how the service works and there are others that want instant gratification, he says, but he mentions that he keeps to the nature of the business and if they want instant gratification they need to then find a service that will then help them. “If we continue doing the same things we will get the same results,” he says. Change your behaviour.

In conclusion Theo says that he has many singles that are now in a successful relationship and some have resulted in engagements as well as marriages. He definitely feels that he has made a difference in many single lives.

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